You are Exactly Where You Need To Be

Jan/Feb/March 🐉🧚🏼🌸

At the beginning of January, I made decision to step away from social media until I reached one year of sobriety from alcohol. Clearly I haven’t been able to follow through with that decision… I’m not entirely sure why I felt the need to take this step, but over the past few months, I’ve come to realize that it was because of the way I interact with social media. I tend to share my secrets, personal moments, and day-to-day experiences, which created a sense of connection that is almost like a one-sided relationship and I’ve found myself in far too many of those in the past 😂 I love being personal/ vulnerable and speaking my truth but I’ve needed to rethink the way I express it online. 

I still want to share my life and thoughts, but l’ve never wanted it to simply be a highlight reel, because I have way too many feelings to express. I think I’ve done well in staying offline considering the way I used it in the past, but I’ll admit, I can’t stay away for too long. And it’s because I’ve cultivated a space online that brings me joy—surrounding myself with people I love, accounts that inspire and educate me, and staying connected with long-distance friends. I also love communicating through photos and seeing everyone else’s life through their eyes. 

However, not being able to fully disconnect from social media reminds me of my old drinking habits—setting goals and abstaining for a time, only to return to it. The purpose of this post is to show myself some grace and remind myself of why I use social media, but also to recognize that part of sobriety is about setting goals and sticking to them, something I haven’t fully achieved in this area.

On May 3rd, I’ll be celebrating one year of sobriety, just 33 days away. They say it takes 30 days to break a habit, and I tend to go 10-15 days without using social media before posting in bursts when I’m excited to share something or catch up. But for the month of April, I want to focus on continuing what I’m doing without the urge to share it. My goal is to stay unplugged for 30 *consecutive* days and continue reflecting on my relationship with this space.

As the saying goes, “April showers bring May flowers.” This month, I’ll honor my journey—one I’ve walked before and thought I had healed from. This time last year, I was struggling to cut alcohol out of my life, but I knew it was something I needed to do and I’m so glad she did. I’m so so proud of the progress she’s made, and I’m grateful for the strength to do it once again. I won’t be summiting a mountain to celebrate this time I promise— that’s part of what led to breaking my sobriety in the first place (we’ll touch more on this later) but because of that relapse I’ve realized we have to continually be setting goals in order to learn + grow. We have to make plans, we cannot stay stagnant!!! So here’s to April and all the adventures 🌞🧚🏼🤍